Oh baby!

Orthodontic pacifiers. BPA free, slow flow bottles - 6 or 9 ounces? Swaddle blankets. Changing pads. Crib mattresses. Belly cast kit....just kidding. ; )

Last week an experienced mama friend accompanied me on the overwhelming task of registering for essential baby gear. Babies "R" Us has long overwhelmed me, and now that I had to create the registry, rather than navigate by the one in hand, the feeling intensified. I am forever indebted to this gracious woman for spending part of her afternoon taming the aisles for me.

I've been trying to get as much stuff done for our baby girl before school starts-workdays arrive in less than two weeks now! With the help of Chad's parents, and another incredible friend, our girl's room is painted, crib assembled, dresser positioned, and curtains hung.  I often wander into her room and look around, dreaming of the day she'll be there with me. Having a place in which to envision her sleeping and playing makes her impending arrival all the more real. That and the increasing frequency of her gymnastic routines in my belly. Honestly, I love being pregnant.

Chad and I already love this girl to pieces, but I still worry about being her mom. I worry if I'll do everything right. I worry if I'll forget to teach her something that will mess her up for the rest of her life. I worry I'll be too neurotic. I worry I'll struggle to balance work and home life once I return to teaching. I worry about a lot. Of course I know I shouldn't worry, but it sneaks up on me. To fight this worry I try to remember and rest in knowing that God created me for this and his provision will show itself once baby girl arrives.

And, on a completely unrelated note, the arrival of August and, soon, school, get me excited for all the great things of autumn - cool weather, scarves, wool sweaters, cozy boots, changing leaves, warm drinks, and holidays!


White Knuckles

This evening, Chad and I (mainly Chad) put together baby girl's crib. Chad doesn't know it, but at one point I fought back tears caused by the sheer joy of our girl's anticipated arrival. It all seems more real today than yesterday. And tomorrow even more, I'm sure. The most amazing part of it all is that no one has met her, yet she is already very loved.

Over the past few months I have spent much leisure time reading any seemingly worthwhile pregnancy and parenting book. With some pages I laughed, some I'm certain I forgot, while others I vowed to disregard in lieu of the ones filled with theories I'm clinging to and, already, have proclaimed to practice as religiously as my own faith. Here's the catch. As valuable as any good sleep training theory worthy of a white knuckle grasp is, the relationships with the vast amount of Godly women-wives and mothers-that the Lord has placed in my life are worth ten thousand times more.

In addition to a regular young mothers' group I attend, last night I took up a friend's invitation to join some Journey Church women as they listened to a (grand)mother share her stories of marriage and parenting at the best French bakery in town. It was in that moment, the moment shared with a chocolate raspberry tart and chai tea latte, soaking up her instruction that I realized the pages I cling to pale in comparison to God's wisdom. I will become the fully equipped mother I am meant to be when I hold on tightly-white knuckle tight-to the wisdom that is revealed when I am on my knees in prayer, surrendering in worship, and humbling myself in the company of mothers who have gone before me and whose children call her blessed.

This is the love that I was talking about. Sure, the women in my life love me, but their willingness to help equip me with the nuances of raising Godly children is the very essence of loving on my baby girl. So, thank you, ladies. Your love is so very gratefully accepted.

Happy Day!

Today is a very special day for two reasons. Chad and I are celebrating three married years together! I am so grateful to have found a man who loves the Lord and seeks His will, a man who encourages and supports me, and a man who makes me laugh. I love you, Chad.

Today also marks baby girl's halfway point; 20 weeks! The miracle of life is so overwhelming. Just a couple of weeks ago we watched our baby girl squirm about on the ultrasound and-as I type this-I can feel her movements in my belly. Maybe we're going to be meeting a rising soccer star?! I simply cannot wait to meet her. However, I did recently receive some great advice from a brand new mother of two last night: 

slow down and enjoy the moment your child is in before it is gone. 

I'll try so hard not to wish away the next 20 weeks and enjoy being pregnant. Baby girl will arrive soon enough.

Wedding photos by our friend

Seth Snider.